I understand the struggle and your burning desire for change.
But Unfortunately, battling is not the right method. YOU CAN’T CHANGE THE NEGATIVE WITH NEGATIVE. In order to obtain real change you must start with changing the source of the problem. Otherwise the problem will keep recurring; because no effective change have been applied. Likewise, To build a strong building, you need a good foundation. we often focus on the problem instead of the source of the problem. Then as reactive beings we try to replace the existing with our perspective, using force. Thus we fail and will keep failing.
Another problem we commit while seeking change, is that we think everything can be solved using Force. while in reality it complicate things even more. TRY USING YOUR ENERGY INSTEAD OF YOUR BODY. Energy can’t be ignored nor avoided. It’s what makes us and the laws of the universe. When you influence a negative source with good energy, you’ll not only succeed in transforming the source. But you will also attract more positive results.
Let me tell you a little story that happened to me a long time ago; We all have that one person who hates us, for no reason. It’s not that he/she spit out their hate, but the repulsive energy they transmit towards you is obvious. Fast forward, I was once put into an event with a person who held such feelings towards me. It’s not like we’ve spoke before. Yet the moment I acknowledged his hate towards me, I began to transmit positive energy ( In the form of thoughts) . Such as ” hey! your safe, your wonderful, your amazing , i love you, you are blessed, I’m peace, I’m not judging you…etc “. I transmitted a combination of love, positivity and healing energy and I kid you not! the situation shifted 360 degrees!!! The person became more relaxed and peaceful. We even became friends later on.
The method I used here is called TELEPATHY COMMUNICATION. I’m not saying that we should always use this technique. My story is only an example that shows you the power of energy. Nevertheless, You can change people using positive energy, in the form of attitude, positive words, thoughts or just A SMILE. To me this’s the true definition of winning, it’s not only by solving a problem but also saving a life. Picking up someone who’s trapped in negatively and giving them light… We’re not here to create enimes, infact we’re ONE. When you harm others you’re indirectly harming yourself. Plus you’re no longer better than them. So use your energy WISELY. 💕
Nobody is hurting us. Instead we hurt ourselves through others. If we don’t turn our focus inward & become conscious of our nature. We’ll allow the past to repeat it’s patterns.
What do you mean by our nature?
The human nature is pure but the ego pollute it. The ego is with each one of us “Humans are like the moon, with a bright side and a dark side”. This is absolutely true. We all have an ego. Some activate it and others don’t. The ego is a basically your DARK SIDE. It feed on negative / low energy. Such as anger, drama, fear, sadness, conflicts, hate and jealousy ..etc.
How does it feed on these emotions? The ego see such emotional state as a chance to activate itself through it. So you find yourself getting angry over little meaningless things or get offended by everything.. etc. If so, understand that it’s not you but your ego trying to take over you. Once the ego activate itself it grow, which makes it powerful. If you allow it to keep growing through the negativity; it will eventually control you.
People who are driven by the ego are very reactive. Their ego jumps as soon as it finds an opportunity for conflicts or drama. Another nature of the ego is that it’s an ego! It only validate itself and it’s not fair. It takes a conscious alert self to admit a mistake. Ego is unconsciousness. It’s not your true self, instead your dark side. Therefore, I excuse unconscious people for their actions. I think we should all do so after learning about the ego. However, the ego can be defeated. Battling the ego require time and constant consciousness.
To fight the ego you must BECOME CONSCIOUS OF IT. Yes! As simple as this. All you should do is become alert of it when it’s present. Absorve your ego at the moment of anger or drama. When you notice the ege it shrink in size. Thus by time the ego will diminish.
How do I know I’m ego_free ?
The state of no-ego; This state is the state of total awareness and self control. It’s inner peace & calmness. After you have finally won over the ego. You will experience such life changing bless❤.
As soon as we give birth our mindset shift from ” free ” to “responsible “. As if a heavy weight is dropped on us. The ego find this an opportunity to grow, so it fool us into defining us with the parenting role. Thus a mother will play the mother role on her kids and gets extremely angry if treated otherwise, because right now it’s not just a role! it’s her identity. WHO SHE IS. Obviously this creates a lot of problems within a family. Parents clinging their kids freedom, Abusing and unfairly dealing with their kids under the role of “parents”. Furthermore, the kids grow up irresponsible, indecisive , lacking personality and independence… Never recovered from the role of ” child ” that was forced by the parents.
Parents! I understand the profound love you’ve for your children. Yet true love can never be expressed through the ego. The ego always seek conflicts to validate itself. The role of a parent is nothing more than a tool for the ego to stay alive inside you and keep you attached. Inaddition the superior parent role creates a boundary between the child and his parent. Any relationship that include the ego is inauthentic.
If you really love your kid and concerned about him/ her, ask yourself these questions every time you catch yourself in the role of parenting.
1. Did I like it when my parents did this to me ?
2. Is their another way I can make my kid understand my message ?
3. WHO is the better teacher experience or what I’m going to say right now ?
4. What’s the worst case scenario my kid can cause ?
5. Is my action and words showing love or the opposite?
6. Do i really want my kid to become the best or be himself ?
You can still be a parent without playing the role of a parent! Give your kids love , give them care & knowledge but through friendship. Become their life companion and not as a superior parent. The best thing you can do is to be YOURSELF. Be real. ONLY REAL THINGS CAN INFLUENCE OTHERS.
Let life teach them! yes, I understand you dont want your kids to do the same mistakes you’ve done. But let’s be real; did you learn through experience or words ? Don’t forget that your experience made you into who you are today. Therefore, give your kids SPACE. Let them be, experience and grow. SPACE is truly the most thing they need. Let go of your attachment to the ego Now! for the sake of your children.